Each one of us has nostalgic memories of childhood in our minds. As I listen to the song “Kho Gaye hum Kahan” remind me of the journey each of us has from childhood to adult. That is in the process of growing, sometimes, we lose our innocence. In childhood, it was less stress, less anxiety, and every day and everything felt as colourful as a rainbow. Each day has a new beginning, bringing a new joy. The happiness came from within and back then from my mother’s cooked meals to my father dropping me to the school and on our way, he used to show me mangoes trees to having ice cream daily with my brother. How these small things made a big difference in my life.
Now, as I have grown, I want those times back where there is less stress, no worry, and more love for myself and others. How I never needed anyone in my life and happiness were within me. Now, when I am standing here, all I see is unhappiness, I have forgotten how to love myself and I feel lost. Maybe, we were told that self-love is selfishness, that we stopped caring about ourselves and let other people treat us like a doormat.
There comes a time when you are tired and you don’t want to be found. All you crave is peace and less anxiety. You want to be that kid again who is careless, immature but happy. How you were a kid and you had people to lean on and all of a sudden you may have 100 people in your contact list but not even a single person you can talk and share things with.
“Fisal Jaye Bhi to darr na koi”, this line in the song feels more nostalgic as how many times we did a lot of mistakes but got on our feet without being hard on ourselves. In this competitive world, all we do is compare and get anxious and have fear of failure. How we young we were, away from the reality of the world. How things have changed and somehow everyone tries to change into the person you are not.
In the end, the song only reminds you that maybe you have lost yourself in the journey of being an adult. And you have forgotten how to be happy all by yourself. How a kid has died inside by expectations and reality of the world. How you have lost your innocence, how judgmental you have become, and how emotional you were and detach you are becoming. And in the end, just losing yourself. But you are just a child locked into an adult’s body who is growing too old.
Triah
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